Provocation is often met with anger on social media, in traffic, and at family gatherings, among other places. On the global stage, a spiral of violence is unfolding, making many of us feel unsafe. As I’ve pointed out in previous articles, there are smarter ways to respond than revenge, and it’s still necessary to remind ourselves of that. It’s about our well-being, as well as our ability to contribute to creating a better world.
Responding to provocation with kindness is not a weakness. It is a conscious choice not to let someone else’s negativity take up residence in you. When we respond with anger, we trigger stress in the body. Heart rate and blood pressure rise, and we enter fight mode, making ourselves vulnerable rather than strong. By breathing deeply and responding with calm or even silent acceptance, we break the pattern. It often disarms the situation, and most importantly, it protects our inner peace. We take control of our reactions and refuse to let the situation define us. It is imperative in close relationships, where our emotional exposure is most significant. A small spark can become a fire, but it can also be extinguished with a smile, a calming comment, or simply by listening.
On a larger scale, we see what happens when retaliation is allowed to dominate the situation. The war between Israel and Palestine has followed a bloody cycle for over 70 years, and recent Israeli attacks inside Iran have made the global situation even more fragile. What is claimed to be self-defense is repeatedly used as justification for escalation, and the result is that the entire region teeters on the brink of chaos. The people of Iran and Israel now also suffer deeply from the consequences of this violent spiral. These lines of conflict revolve around power, fear, history, and injustice, as well as the lack of reconciliation. A constant attack in response to an attack solves nothing. It creates new trauma, destroys trust, and makes future peace even more challenging to achieve. We see the same phenomenon on a smaller scale, such as in family disputes, neighborhood quarrels, and workplace tensions. When revenge becomes the currency, everyone suffers.
What often helps in conflicts—both large and small—is seeing the human being behind the actions. What is the other person feeling? What are they afraid of? What do they want? Asking these questions can create space for empathy and understanding. Listening, expressing your own needs without accusation, and showing a willingness to understand are keys to actual conflict resolution. It takes practice, especially when you feel you’ve been mistreated. But that is precisely when it matters most, for preserving your dignity and mental well-being. Kindness is a wise response, a gift to yourself that increases your inner strength and calm.
But what if kindness doesn’t reach through? When every attempt at dialogue is met with contempt or violence? When you’re faced with people or systems that exploit goodness and refuse to compromise? It is a profoundly human dilemma. Violence rarely solves anything in the long term, but passivity in the face of evil can also be dangerous. In such cases, we must explore new paths, such as forming alliances, employing nonviolent resistance, exerting international pressure, and practicing strategic patience. Gandhi, Mandela, and King understood this. Kindness must sometimes be brave and unyielding. It must protect, but not hate.
We cannot always choose what happens to us, but we can choose how we respond to it. And in a world where conflict spreads like wildfire, kindness can be a radical force. It may not change the world overnight, but it can change the moment in which you have a chance to make a difference. And moments are what life is made of. When neither violence nor kindness seems to work, we are left with the hardest task of all: not to lose hope. Because love—in the form of respect, empathy, and the ability to see the human in the other, is the only currency that never loses its value. When love makes mercy step in, not as a feeling, but as a choice to act with quiet strength. Like a tortured innocent victim who forgives and, by that, reveals something deeper than justice. It is the currency that holds us together when the world breaks apart.
Featured image © Eldar Einarson
